I Promise You
by Becky Sky
Summary: When your life is slipping away, and you can do nothing to stop it, sometimes it takes love to save you from yourself...


I Promise You

Falling. This is what Jay dreams about every night. Falling into a deep black pit, without the hope of surviving. It is what terrifies him; the thought of leaving this world behind forever. The thought of leaving the ones he loves without a husband or father.

Jay tosses and turns in bed, pulling all the covers over from Theresa's side. She sits up and rolls over to face him, her green eyes wide with concern. "Jay, wake up," she whispers, shaking him. "You're having a nightmare."

He jolts awake, shoulders heaving with fear. He glances at his wife, so strong and determined; not like him. He shakes with sobs. She hugs him to her like a tiny child, patting his back consolingly. "We'll get through this together," she whispers, her voice a ray of light in the darkness that has become his life. "I promise you."

Jay embraces her back, thankful for her like he is everyday. Her will and her beauty and her love are what drive him on. The fact that she is always there for him is like having an extra hand to help him write, or an extra voice to help him say what he means.

"Thank you," he says. Lately life has been hurting Jay more than usual. He had been diagnosed with cancer three months ago, and the doctors only gave him about a year to live. As he lies in bed trying to get back to sleep, he thinks about Theresa and his two little boys, Connor and Tim. Then he thinks about the other child on the way, destined to grow up without her dad. Theresa would have to raise the children on her own, and he could do nothing. The feeling of helplessness angers him, and he clenches his fists, wondering why the gods wouldn't save him.

Suddenly he feels a savage kick in his shins from Theresa, who scolds him. "Jay, don't think that they don't want to save you," she lectures. "It's just that they want to bring out the fighter in you. They know you can beat this illness if you fight with all you've got, and I believe it too."

He sighs; the fact that she can read minds is how she found out he was going to propose before he actually did; it was how she learned that his mother had been taking over their wedding plans without Theresa knowing, and it was how she had jailed so many criminals in her early years as a cop.

"How can you believe it when I don't believe it myself?" he asks miserably. She takes his hand under the covers and squeezes it tightly.

"You have to believe it," she says, and for the first time since he's been diagnosed he hears the desperation in her voice. "For us, Jay; for your family."

"I know, it's just so hard," he points out, ashamed.

"It doesn't have to be," she returns. "You're not alone."

He doesn't say anything, and she lets out a disappointed sigh and drops his hand, turning over and getting back to sleep without another word. He feels as though he's let her down, and he closes his eyes, but all he sees are the times when Theresa was there for him no matter what, always supportive and always loving. When he had died, she had encouraged the others to never give up on finding a cure, and when he had made mistakes, she was always the first to forgive him. And now he was abandoning her, forgetting everything they had been through.

He couldn't let cancer make him forget that it was beatable. He couldn't let it make him forget that he wasn't an island in the midst of a busy world.

I can beat it, I know I can, he tells himself.

He reaches for Theresa and wraps his arms around her. "Theresa, I'm sorry," he whispers into her hair. "I promise that I'll fight like never before to beat this thing. For you and the kids."

Theresa pulls back and looks deep into his eyes, her own emerald orbs full of tears. "And I promise I'll never give up on you, no matter what." She strokes his cheek tenderly, her eyes full of love and hope.

Suddenly two small figures appear in the doorway. "Mommy, we had a bad dream," seven year old Connor whines, and his five year old brother whimpers from beside him, clutching his teddy bear.

Theresa and Jay exchange knowing smiles. "Come one up here, loves," Theresa whispers, patting the spot between her and Jay. The two boys clamber onto the bed, cuddling in between their parents for protection. The two adults lie back against their pillows, their fingers entwined. They pat the heads of their children comfortingly and then Theresa closes her eyes.

But Jay lies awake for a little while longer, listening to the quiet, steady breathing of the ones he loves. He feels stronger, as though the love of the ones around him is his life line.

He smiles. Maybe this is true. Love is a very strong thing; and so is a promise. He glances across the bed, at Connor and Tim, curled up in the middle, their faces trusting and innocent, and Theresa, motherly and hopeful, her face radiating peace and love. It's going to be easy to keep a promise to a family like them.

"I love you," he whispers, even though he thinks they're asleep. But Theresa squeezes his hand tightly in acknowledgement. "I love you too," she mumbles sleepily.

"And I promise I'll beat this cancer," he repeats for the second time that night, but believing it wholeheartedly now.

He peeks over at her to see her smile, lighting up the room with her faith in him. "I know," she says. "I know. Because you always keep your promises."

**A/n: Please review! I hope you liked this story… it handles a bit more of a serious issue, and reflects the power of family and love. I hope you enjoyed it.**


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